WHY ARE THERE SIDEWALKS BESIDE MOST STREETS AND HIWAYS?
So Ford owners have a safe place to walk home.
WHY DID FORD PUT HEATERS IN THE TAILGATES OF THEIR NEW
TRUCKS?
To keep their hands warm when they are pushing the truck
into the shop.
HOW IS A GOLF BALL DIFFERENT FROM A FORD?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards!
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS DRIVE A FORD
FORD ACRONYMS:
Backwards... Driver Returns On Foot
Factory Ordered Road Disaster
Factory Ordered Rebuilt Dodge(Datsun)
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road Dead
Flip Over Read Directions
Four Old Rusted Doors
Fixed On Race Day
Ford Owner Really Dumb
For Only Retarded Drivers
Fabrication Ordinaire Reparation Dispendieuse - French
for
ordinary fabrication expensive repairs.
Ford Owners Recommend Dodge
Flipped Over Russian Dunebuggy
Found On Russian Dump
For Off Road Death
it Freaking Only Runs Downhill
Fat Old Rusted Dog
Freaking Old Rusted Dodge(Datsun)
Frigin Oakies Really Dig it
Funky Old Road Dog
Backwards...Don't Ride Over Fifty
Found on Road Ditches
PINTO ACRONYMS:
Paid Inspector Nicely To Overlook
LINE FROM A SONG SUNG BY A FAMOUS COUNTRY SINGER
"I wanta buy me a Ford truck and push it up and down
the road."
This is Chevy country and on a quiet night you can hear
a Ford rust...
A man pulled up next to a little girl walking home from
school and said "If you get in, I'll give you a lollypop." The
girl kept walking. Following along slowly, the man said "Come on and
get in the car with me and I'll give you two lolly pops." She kept
her eyes on the sidewalk and continued on her way. The man said "Get
in with me and I'll give you this whole bag of lollypops!" Finally,
the girl turned and said "Look daddy, YOU bought the Ford, YOU ride
in it!!!"
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. If it wasn't for our Fords,
our tools would rust.
This is your brain "CHEVY", this is your brain
on drugs "FORD"
Buy a Ford and you buy the best. Drive the first mile
and walk the rest.
Have you driven over a Ford lately?
Ford trucks the worst always rest
I could never keep a Ford under me, I was always under
the Ford.
Do you know that Ford has admitted they are expensive
and unreliable? That new commercial they are running says so! When that
country singer says "If I had me some money" he admits he can't
afford one, and when he adds that he'd "buy a Ford truck or two"
it because he needs a spare.
Next time some Fordnatic claims Ford means "First
on race day" remind them that anything could be fast if a team of
mechanics worked on it all week so it would last long enoug to run a race
before needing another weeks work.
WHY ARE THE NEW FORD TRUCKS AND CARS MORE AERODYNAMIC?
So they will save the Chevy gas when the Chevy tows them
away.
WHAT SHOULD THE FORD MUSTANG REALLY BE CALLED?
The Ford Rustang, The Ford Muststink
WHY IS THIS COUNTRY SO FAR IN DEBT?
Because the President drives a Ford
WHAT DID THE CHEVY SAY TO THE FORD?
Would you like a tow home?
HOW CAN THEY APPROVE THE NEW FORD TRUCK OR CAR?
Put a Chevy engine in it.
HOW MUCH WOOD CAN A FORD TRUCK HAUL IF A FORD TRUCK COULD
HAUL WOOD?
As much as the Chevrolet tow truck in front of it.
WHAT SHOULD A FORD THUNDERBIRD REALLY BE CALLED?
A ford thunderturd
SPEED KILLS DRIVE A FORD LIVE FOR EVER
I'd rather push a Chevy than drive a Ford!
HOW DO YOU DOUBLE THE VALUE OF A PINTO?
Fill it with gas!
The Ford Escort. Otherwise known as The Ford Escort Me
To A Chevy Dealer!
Have You Out Driven a Ford Lately?
Ford is just another four letter word!
The Ford Ranger, Otherwise know as the Ford Danger!
The Ford Explorer, Otherwise know as the Ford Exploder!
